When you start the search for a loved one, you encounter different types of daters. Unfortunately, not all people have their hearts in the right place. And while you are looking for a long-term relationship, they have completely different goals on the dating field. Today, we are going to discuss one of the types of such people - a serial dater. But what is serial dating? What is wrong with it? Let's consider serial dater psychology and determine what dangers such a lifestyle entails. So, let's go!
Why the Problem Of Serial Daters Bothers People Nowadays?
First of all, you should know a serial dater meaning. Therefore, let's consider a serial dater definition. In fact, a serial dater is someone who does not want to play by the rules of ordinary dating. This is a person who enjoys dating rush and those exciting emotions at the beginning of a romantic relationship. Serial daters do not build long-lasting relationships, such people like only the first couple of dates, after which they become bored, lose interest in a person, and rush to find new love. It can be said that a serial dater falls in love not with a person but with the dating process itself. Why does it happen? There may be several options for origins of serial dating:
- a broken heart. That is, a person avoids serious relationships so as not to feel frustrated again or starts serial dating to take revenge upon the opposite sex;
- sexual compulsivity (hypersexuality);
- self-doubt. Thus, a serial dater tries to bolster self-esteem attracting beautiful ladies/handsome guys.
Why does the problem of serial daters bother people these days? The fact is that, at first, a serial dater creates hopes for a wonderful romantic relationship but then, abruptly leaves, breaking not only someone's heart but also hopes for a happy relationship. Thus, people find the search for a loved one more difficult and cease to trust others. It is especially noticeable when considering a man and woman dating site. After all, nobody wants to be deceived in such a cruel way, so the problem of serial dating bothers a lot of people nowadays.
8 Signs of a Serial Dater
A serial dater is a real master in attracting the opposite sex. Due to the extensive experience in dating, such a person knows well how to arouse interest and take a liking to a "victim." Women are more susceptible to such tricks, so there are 8 signs of a serial dater that pretty ladies should know to protect themselves.
1. His friends do not get too cozy with you
Why his friends will get cozy with every new girl if a serial dater changes them once a week? Even if such a man introduces you to his friends, their coldness and standoffishness should raise red flags. They behave in such a way because they know that there is no need to build friendly relationships with you, as their friend will soon break up with you and become immersed in a new relationship with someone else.
2. Immoderate confidence
An ordinary guy is always very worried about a date with a girl he likes, and this is noticeable for women. Such a guy can joke incongruously, drop things, or confuse words. But a serial dater is completely confident in his abilities and does not worry about problems in relationships at all. And this is not surprising, after all, the serial dater has already done it a thousand times! Although women love self-confident men, overconfidence should alert you.
3. He is a master of compliments
A serial dater always showers pretty ladies with pleasant words and compliments. At the same time, he does not even need any reasons for such manifestations of tenderness. The serial dater simply knows that girls love with ears and so, skillfully uses it.
4. He does not tell a lot about himself
Although a serial dater is a great talker, it will seem to you that you know nothing about him at all. He speaks only about himself without going into details. He is not interested in your hobbies, interests, problems, and life in general. Moreover, serial daters avoid direct questions about their ex-girlfriends and former relationships saying, "At the moment, I'm interested only in you." This is one of the most popular aspects of serial dating psychology.
5. He is extremely attractive
A serial dater is a handsome, well-dressed, and fashionable man. He constantly strives to look his best because he knows how women appreciate and love well-groomed men. Thus, serial daters use their impressive appearance to their advantage and have no problems with attracting women.
6. He has a lot of female friends on social networks
Do not get it wrong, men have friends of the opposite sex, and there is nothing wrong with that, but if you know that your new acquaintance communicates with a great number of girls on social networks, this is one of the signs of a serial dater. No guy spends time looking at the photos of his female friends unless he hopes for a relationship with them.
7. He tells you that he’s not ready for something serious
The underneath meaning of this phrase is, "I do not want to be in a relationship with you." If you date a man, and after several dates, he tells you such a phrase, do not waste time convincing him otherwise. Unwillingness to become emotionally attached to a girl means that a man does not want anything serious with her and, at the same time, is not ready to say goodbye.
8. Protected mobile phone
Serial daters will always protect their mobile phones. Even in case you have never checked the phone of a beloved man, if you do this, you will find out that there are no messages and photos at all. Serial daters always clean their correspondence history and phones of suspicious information that could reveal them.
Main Dangers of Being a Serial Dater
What is wrong with being a serial dater? You have many partners, start and end relationships when you want it, and at the same time, you have no obligations. But not everything is so rosy. You should be aware of the main dangers of being a serial dater.
1. The risk of getting used to lies
Serial daters often make plans concerning their romantic dates but can easily dial them back if they encounter something more exciting (for example, an unexpected acquaintance with an attractive girl). Thus, serial romantic acquaintances lead to empty promises, and this makes a serial dater unreliable person. Besides, it causes more harm and pain to people with whom the dater deals. Although honesty is a very important aspect of life, and this also applies to romantic relationships.
2. Serial relationships addiction
Serial dating quickly grows into a habit. Therefore, building numerous relationships becomes an ordinary way of life of a serial dater. Such a person forgets about all the other joys of life and pursues only one goal – to find new love. This is a kind of addiction that is difficult to get rid of.
3. A serial dater always loses in the final count
A person who devotes life to chasing the representatives of the opposite sex always loses in the final count. After all, a serial dater attracts potential partners out of habit and without the purpose of building a happy relationship or marriage at all. Such behavior is acceptable for young people who have not found themselves yet. But a mature person should build a family and career, take responsibility, and achieve goals, and a serial dating lifestyle prevents people from developing themselves. Therefore, it comes to no good.
4. It will be difficult to create a family
Serial relationships cannot last forever. Sooner or later, a serial dater gets a craving for settling down, starting a real long-term relationship and building a family. And for serial daters, it will be very difficult to do this, because they do not have experience in maintaining long-term relationships. They will have to deal with a lot of relationship problems and may even have hurtful break-ups.
5. Sexually transmitted diseases
This applies to those serial daters who often engage in sexual relationships. It is no secret that a healthy sexual life implies the presence of one partner and regular sex. Since serial daters often enter new romantic relationships and change partners, they run the risk of getting sexually transmitted diseases.
How to Fix Your Serial Relationship Lifestyle
If a serial dater wants to start a serious relationship and stop chasing the opposite sex, then at the beginning, it will be quite difficult to do this. Why? Because serial dating is a certain way of living that becomes habitual within a short period. However, there are some helpful tips on how to fix the serial relationship lifestyle.
1. Take a break
First of all, you should take a break on your impetuous dating journey to fix your serial relationship lifestyle. Try to resist the desire to search for just another love and enter romantic relationships for a while. Of course, it will not be easy, but it will help you get rid of the habit of looking for a new “victim” twenty-four hours straight.
2. Find new hobbies
The best way to fix a serial relationship lifestyle is to find new hobbies. How does it work? New hobbies and interests will help you turn your attention to something else and take your mind off the dating rush. For example, you can sign up for insightful courses, attend a gym, engage in sports activities, learn to play a musical instrument, and so on. Moreover, try to spend more time with friends and family. All this will give you positive emotions, and there will be no need to draw pleasant feelings from serial relationships.
3. Seek help from a therapist
It happens that serial dating turns into a real addiction. In this case, it is very difficult to get rid of this problem yourself. If you have already tried many ways to fix your serial relationship lifestyle, but no one helps you, it is time to seek help from a therapist. Thus, you will sort yourself out and be able to solve the problem easier and faster.
To sum up, serial dating is an unscrupulous way to build romantic relationships that harm not only people around but also serial daters themselves. Please remember that if you do not want to change yourself, then no love of a truly good person can change you and your lifestyle. Take the above-mentioned tips into account, and you will be able to fix your serial relationship lifestyle. We wish you find what you are looking for!