Attitude to loneliness can take various forms at different stages of our lives. It happens that people even enjoy it and try to find out how to be a happy in solitude. For example, they do not answer calls and messages because they want to be by themselves for a while, spend the whole day on the couch, watching their favorite movies or reading books, and do not feel any guilt about it. But there are times when a person simply hates being single: they get tired of sleepless nights, begin to panic that they will not find a loved one, and are afraid to be alone for life. Yes, it is sad. However, not everything is lost! After all, it is possible to be happy even when you are tired of being single. Therefore, we are going to tell you how to be single and happy and give some tips that will allow you to change your mind and take a fresh look at your life.
Being alone vs. being single – is there a difference?
In the modern world, many people are tired of being alone. And the scale of this problem is growing every day. Moreover, a lot of people often do not realize that they are able to overcome this disturbing feeling of loneliness and be single and happy. And thus, a person feels his or her own futility and uselessness.
Are you single – independent and self-sufficient, or are you alone – abandoned, rejected, and left without communication? These two states are different from each other. You should understand that being single does not necessarily mean being alone. Every person is sometimes left alone, and there is no way around it. But being single means that you feel quite comfortable in the company of yourself. Moreover, you always can overcome loneliness and learn how to enjoy being single. After all, the fact that you are single does not mean that you should feel lonely. In reality, it can be even better than in the company of other people.
Signs you're really tired of being single
Of course, it is impossible to remain single all the time. At a certain point, it starts to bother a lonely person. Consequently, they want to change their life and do everything to get out of this tormenting state. But how to understand that such a moment has come? There are several obvious signs.
Your hobbies and work don't bring you joy
A single person often gets positive emotions from their favorite work, hobbies, and interests. While loving couples find happiness in each other, a lonely person is looking for other ways to get a charge of positive emotions and enjoy life. But if work and hobbies ceased to bring you joy, it means that you are tired of being a single man. Therefore, find some beautiful single women to build a relationship.
You lower your expectations about potential partners
People often cannot find love and become lonely because of overly high expectations for the opposite sex. Previously, you wanted to find a charming prince or the hottest woman in the world, but now, you only want a person who can understand and support you? It means you are really tired of being single and ready to start a romantic relationship.
Random couples irritate you
Happy lovers often go to extremes, and their behavior in the public spotlight causes slight bewilderment of others (sometimes even irritation). Such couples believe that love is a wonderful and amazing feeling. Therefore, they do not afraid to show their intimate feelings openly, embarrassing others. Earlier, you treated them normally or did not pay attention at all, but now, happy loving couples annoy you, eh? It happens because subconsciously, you are tired of being single and want to find love.
You start looking for new connections
Meeting new people gives us new experiences and emotions. Our life is often oversaturated with routine and boredom, so new acquaintances always give an element of surprise and bring vivid impressions that allow people to make their life brighter and feel its drive. One of the most obvious signs that you are tired of being single is your desire to make new connections and meet women.
How to deal with being single
We are often afraid of loneliness and try to fill every second of silence with other people, gadgets, and the Internet. But how to deal with being single? What to do if you are so tired of being lonely? There are 7 best tips that will surely help you deal with being single.
1. Take a step back
First of all, analyze why you are tired of being single. It is very important to be absolutely honest with yourself. What exactly connects you with the status of a single man? You think this means that you are unattractive, uninteresting, and not seductive enough for the representatives of the opposite sex. Or you are afraid that you will remain alone forever. The reason that bothers you comes down to how you feel about yourself and your life. That is what you need to determine.
Of course, many will answer: "I want to get married and have children." Alas, it is not the reason that makes you feel miserable being single, it only cultivates your fear. Just think: does the fact that you are single now mean that you will not marry and have children at all? No. If tomorrow you still will not be married, does this mean that you will never marry and give birth to children? No. You get what we mean, don’t you? Single people often use the present moment as evidence that the worst future will come true, but it just doesn't make sense. The fact that you are not married right now does not predict your future. Everything depends on you!
2. Do not hesitate to be single
Do not be shy of your loneliness to declare loudly: being by yourself is the most stable, non-disturbing, relaxing “relationship” that you can imagine. You do not need to wait for a response to the message or suffer wondering whether your message was too flirty, demanding, or verbose. Of course, it does not mean that you are not going to date someone in the future – you will definitely find love if you want to. As of now, you know for sure that the relationship that you managed to build with yourself is a relationship that you would like to have with another person. So, learn how to be okay with being alone and do not hesitate to.
3. Take care of yourself
Time spent alone is a real chance to engage in self-development and taking care of your health and appearance. Treat yourself to the foam bath, buy something delicious, or have fun with friends. Fulfill your dreams and do what you have long been going to. It doesn't even matter what you do. The main thing is to become healthier, more beautiful, and happier. Let time spent by yourself be associated not with longing and boredom, but with self-improvement and self-care. This is how to stay single and happy.
4. Step out of your comfort zone
Doing something for the first time is difficult, scary, and awkward. But in order to feel life to the fullest and see the opportunities that it opens up, one has to overcome his or her fears and complexes. Therefore, try to eat out alone, watch a movie at the cinema, or go for a walk. Do not worry about what others will think. Indeed, you do not blame single people you see anywhere for being on their own, don’t you?
5. Spend time with other people
Do you always mourn “I'm so tired of being alone”? But being single and happy does not mean isolating yourself from the world. It means being self-confident enough and realizing that you can surround yourself with people, but not depend on them. A person will never be alone if they are ready to share their time, attention, mood, skills, and goodwill with other people. But by only focusing on their problems and having a grudge against the whole world, they make the chance to stay alone forever quite high.
Try to spend more time with your relatives (parents, sisters, brothers, nephews...) or good friends. For example, visit your nephews, give them some symbolic gifts, take an interest in their successes, and so on. Play with the children, teach them something, make them laugh, or just read a book out loud. Relatives will be very grateful to you, not to mention the delight of the children themselves. Also, you can visit a shelter or hospital and become a volunteer.
6. Work on external and internal communication
In order to make your external communication successful, find friends with the same interests as you have. For example, if you play sports, enroll for the appropriate sports club. It will be easier for you to build communication in the company of like-minded people who share your hobbies and have similar plans for the future.
And the work on internal communication means studying your feeling of loneliness. Analyze when it first appeared, what emotions it gives you, and when it disappears. Be sure to write down these thoughts. Thus, it will be easier for you to find out the source of emptiness in the heart.
7. Love yourself
Think about what you do with special fervor and enthusiasm. What were you passionate about before you met your ex? What did you want to devote your life to? Now, it is time to do it. Learn. Act. Develop yourself. This is a high-day of your personality! Be the person you want to say “Hello” to in the morning and “Good night” in the evening. Be the person you want to see in the mirror and smile because you are beautiful. Be the one who takes care of you when you get sick and loves you despite everything. Be your own hero! Because now, you have only you, and therefore, you should be the best for yourself. Loneliness is the state when you learn to love yourself.
A few benefits of being single
If you are single, then we have good news for you – you are very lucky! After all, romantic relationships, which seem to you such a holiday, is not as good as you think. Opinion polls that are regularly conducted in the United States only confirm this idea. Of course, we don’t want to suggest the idea that living well means living alone. We just want to help you relax if you suddenly feel sad about your loneliness. And so, look at the benefits of being single.
1. You are the architect of your own happiness
In a relationship, people often expect their partners to satisfy common needs. That is, they see themselves as a whole, and not as individuals. In the end, everyone gives up on their own desires, and it makes us unhappy. We think for two, not for ourselves. In addition, we relieve ourselves of responsibility for happiness, because there is a person nearby who is also responsible for it. Being single changes the attitude to happiness fundamentally, because there is no person you can shield yourself behind. You think more about your well-being, mental state, work, hobby, and small mercies. There is no need to think for another person and find "something in common." You just do things that make you happy.
2. You gain self-esteem
Living alone is a test that leads to complete self-sufficiency, psychological, and physical independence. Single people are more likely to make high ground decisions, they are less afraid and more confident in themselves because they know their own worth and realize that they can survive in this complex world without a partner. They know how to control aggression, empathize, and find harmony with themselves even in the most difficult times.
3. You will keep fit
One UK survey found that most married people lose in physical activity. You can write it off for age, but the survey data also suggest that unmarried or divorced people lead a much more active lifestyle. Why does it happen? The obvious explanation is that a single man subconsciously reaches for a better physical shape to attract a potential partner. In addition, there is another reason – single people have more time to go to the gym, engage in sports activities, and take walks. In most cases, the only activity with a loved one is sex.
Being single may be very tiresome and difficult because it contradicts the basic human instincts – propagation and creating a family. But since you already have such an opportunity, why not become a little better for a new relationship? Firstly, do not be afraid to do things that make you happy. Secondly, think about your own desires and possibilities. Thirdly, fill every day with interesting activities and new acquaintances. Decide what is important to you, love yourself, and be the master of your universe!