You probably wondered how to make your relationship last. Typically, people get in and out of relationship at least a couple of times during their lives. More than half of all people involved in serious long-term relationships reported that they have experienced a breakup. People break up and then start looking for new partners all the time. Considering all this, one might assume that there is no certainty about relationships. Perhaps this is so but still, most people do the same mistakes again and again. Read the following guide in order to avoid usual troubles. People who want to have successful relationships should prepare for a challenge that will be rewarded.
How to Have a Successful Relationship?
1. Commitment, Care, and Trust
There are many keys to a successful relationship. Start with making a commitment. What does it mean? Speaking in broad terms, it means to be really involved in a relationship. You should concentrate and make an effort to show that you are really interested in your partner. Making a commitment means being serious about relationship. In other words, don’t play around but accept responsibility. Always keep in mind that relationship is not all about having fun and pursuing pleasure. The key word here you should always remember is “responsibility”.
When you’re involved in a serious long-term relationship, you should trust your partner and make your partner trust you. There is no place in a relationship for lies of any kind. Tell everything and be open. Trust between the partners is something they both are responsible for. Trust is an irreplaceable component of a relationship success. Be true to your partner and demand truth in exchange. Having secrets has never been useful for people in relationships.
One of the reasons people become involved in serious relationships is because they want to be taken care of. Care and comfort are the fundamental things without which there is no hope for success. You should care about your partner always at any time of day or night and at any occasion. Be supportive and understanding. Approach your partner with all possible kindness and love.
2. Love Your Partner Unconditionally
Loving your partner unconditionally means not trying to change him/her. Think about this: true love does not have any demands. You love your partner for what he/she is and not for what he/she can become. Trying to change your partner is one of the most common mistakes people in relationships make. When partners notice such attitude, it makes them think that they are not loved as they are.
People who ask how to build successful relationships need to know that it is normal to have troubles in relationships. Without challenges and efforts, relationships would simply be worthless. Only hardships and struggles make them valuable. Therefore, be ready to spend time and effort in order to prove your intentions to your partner. If you think you can relax, you are mistaken. You should use each second, minute, day, and week to prove your love to your partner. You will also be able to enjoy yourself in the process.
3. Do You Want to Have Family or Not?
The most common reason people become involved in serious long-term relationships is because they want to create a family. Not all people fit to be mothers and fathers, though. Still, it takes two to create a family and there are families without children. Think about family. Do you want it? Do you need it? Can you handle it? Talk about it with your partner. Talk about living together and be together for as long as it is possible. Being a family means having a person you can rely on like you rely on yourself. You should be ready to do the same for your partner.
4. The Importance of Equality
If you ask how to build a successful relationship, then forget about anger, jealousy, hatred, grief, and pride. Even though all these feelings are natural and people experience them at different stages in their life, there is no place for them in front of a loved person.
Try avoiding them at any cost. When you’re angry, don’t let your anger have a negative effect on your partner. You should always try to not express negative emotions onto your partner. It is easily said but difficult to do. Try your best and your effort will be noticed. Nobody’s perfect and there is no ideal recipe for a relationship. Make an effort and be ready to face challenges. There is no place for dominance or subjection in successful relationships. You are equal in everything and both of you have the right of personal opinion. You two are unique individuals with your own worldviews and each of you should have private space no matter how you love each other. Personal freedom is a basic need of any human.
5. Define What Keeps You Together and Respect Each Other
You should always be able to answer the following question: why you two are together? Define what makes you interested in each other. Make a list of things that attract you to each other. Imagine you’re writing a history of your relationship. This history should contain a list of reasons you chose one another and not some other people to be with. Keep this information in mind and remember it occasionally.’
What makes a successful relationship is mutual respect. You simply cannot be with another person out of guilt or duty. In order to stay together and be happy you should respect each other. What does it mean to respect a person? It means accepting his/her dreams, desires, opinions, thoughts, and activities. There is a possibility you will spend a lot of time together, so why not make this time as interesting and productive as it can be?
6. The Role of Sex and Time Spent Together
No matter what anybody has to say, the most truthful opinion on the matter is the following: success in relationship is impossible without sexual content. It means that you should desire your partner and be satisfied about your sex life. Same goes for your partner. In other words, you should totally satisfy each other in bed or, at least, try your best at doing so.
One of the keys to a successful relationship is mutual entertainment. All couples watch movies together, go to dinner, travel, etc. These activities make you enjoy spending time together. You automatically become more connected with your partner when you experience positive emotions and do something interesting together. This way you make good memories and share your pleasure with the one you love.
So, always aim at spending time together. It is up to you and your partner to decide what you do together. It is also up to you to define when both of you need time to be alone. Be moderate and wise. Don’t spend all your time together and don’t avoid each other as well. Be in the middle.
7. Make Each Other Spontaneous Presents
Another key to a successful relationship is to give presents to each other without particular reasons. It is predictable to make a present because of some holiday or special date. The best way of doing a surprise is to make spontaneous presents without reasons. One and only reason is because you care for your partner. Buy some small things or something special and surprise your partner. Everybody likes presents. When your partner doesn’t expect it, it is twice as pleasant for him/her to receive a present from you.
8. Organize Your Finances and Divide Household Duties
If you’re in a serious long-term relationship, then you probably live with your partner or plan to move in together. Sensual romantic relationships are not only about love, passion, and pleasure. It is also about responsibility and duties. Couples say that a half of all arguments are about household chores. It means that to avoid these arguments, you need to share duties. Make a system and divide responsibilities. One of the reasons people become irritated by each other is when one partner does more than the other. You should aim at equality and always be willing to sacrifice and do more. Replace your demands with deeds.
Before starting to wonder how to have a successful relationship, make the right start. From the very beginning of your serious relationship, you should organize and systematize your finances. You can have a family budget or each can have their own money. Still, don’t forget you are going to buy almost everything together which requires you to spend time and effort to make a system that will suit you.
When one partner does less duties, it automatically means he/she exploits his/her partner. There is no place for exploitation in successful relationships. Be responsible about what needs to be done. Your house is the place where you both live. You can have different criteria of household duties but never ignore or avoid this subject. The best way to handle all the possible problems is to foresee them and talk about them. Make a system out of everything if you need. Do things in turns. One time you do the laundry, another time your partner. Same can be applied to everything.
9. Become Involved in Each Other’s Lives
The level of your involvement in your partner’s life is one another to a successful relationship. The more you are involved the better. So, become involved. It requires you to do a lot of things, most of which will be pleasant. Start by meeting your partner’s friends. Familiarize yourself with your partner’s job, hobbies, history, preferences, etc. At some point you are going to meet your partner’s parents, sisters, and/or other family members. While it may not always be pleasant, it kind of indicates the level of your involvement. Whether you live together or not is another indicator of the level of your involvement.
You can make your connection stronger and relationship better by traveling together. Like it was said earlier doing things together and spending time with each other is the best way to make your relationship happy. Relationship specialists and life coaches advise to travel together in order to have a new mutual experience. It is very much like retreats and corporative trainings when a group of people go hiking or riding a boat to build team spirit. You and your partner are a team. Your life is your mission. Better connection will make your relationship last longer. Moreover, you will become happier in the process.
10. Learn How to Communicate
Every person requires individual approach. We better communicate with somebody who knows us and whom we also know well. This “knowledge” builds with time. When you know you can rely on your partner and trust him/her, you start to communicate in a more sincere way. With time you should be able to talk about everything and anything. People who can communicate solve their problems because they are able to express concerns and state demands. Being silent about something that needs to be talked out is never useful. Therefore, pay close attention to communication with your partner.
What Can Prevent You from Relationship Success
When you are in a relationship, it's okay to expect certain things from a partner because you have desires and needs that should be satisfied to feel happy. However, sometimes, expecting too much, you provoke problems instead of developing habits for relationship success. If you really want to have a healthy and successful relationship, you should better give up the following demands that prevent you from relationship success.
1. Don’t think that a partner will change for you. There is not one person who absolutely likes everything in their partner. There is always something that you will not like. Of course, people change for the sake of their loved ones, but you should not expect this from them. This is only their decision. In addition, you knew what you were getting into. Surely, you also have some “drawbacks” that your partner does not like, and which you are not ready to change.
2. Don’t think that a partner will always feel guilty. If you want to achieve the relationship success after cheating, stop making your partner feel guilty. If you have already met this challenge and decided to move on, don’t try to use their guilt to manipulate or humiliate. Leave your past in the past or break up if you cannot really forgive your partner and start everything from the scratch.
3. Don’t think that a partner will always make compromises. If you know that it is your fault, but you still wait for an apology from your partner, don’t think that your relationship will be successful. If you do not like to admit your mistakes, then why should your partner like this? Especially when it's obvious, that it's your fault. Be able to take responsibility for your actions and deeds as well as to solve the conflicts and make compromises.
4. Don’t think that your relationship will always be romantic. It’s very strange to think that your relationship will always be filled with romantic emotions and excitement. Romance doesn’t come out of anywhere. Only you can keep a fire burning and make efforts to save your strong feelings. Learn to notice some beauty in usual things, read relationship success stories and make conclusions.
5. Don’t think that a partner will always choose only you. Your partner is not your property. They also have their own life. Do not prevent your partner from meeting with their family or friends. Do not make them choose between you and their career or hobby. All this creates their personality. If you take away a piece of the puzzle, then your partner will no longer be the person you have fallen in love with. Ability to accept the person is one of the keys to a successful relationship.
6. Don’t think that a partner will always 100% honest. There are some things and thoughts that you cannot open to your partner. Your soulmate can feel the same. If they don’t tell you everything, it does not mean that they hide something or cheat on you. If they are not completely honest with you, then they’ve decided that this is not worth sharing. Let it go. This is one of the successful relationship tips.
7. Don’t think that a partner will make you happy. To make you happy is not your partner task but your own one. If you are unhappy, do something. Make efforts to change the situation completely. Find the reasons for your unhappiness. If your partner is such a reason, then talk to them or leave.
8. Don’t think that a partner will build your self-esteem. Of course, you like when the partner compliments you, it makes you happy. However, your self-esteem shouldn’t depend only on that. Your complexes will not disappear anywhere if you don’t work on them. You need to cope with this problem yourself. Take care of your appearance or psychology.
All in all, there are many things which can help your relationship be successful. Remember that you’re in it for happiness. Same goes for your partner. Romantic relationships are not all about pleasure and passion. Never forget that you become responsible for your partner and can hurt him/her easily. Organize your finances, share your duties, spend time together, and talk about your concerns. Be happy and good luck!